I read about
the shootings in Overland Park, Kansas and was shocked. That is not normal for this part of the
country, for a lot of reasons. I
happened to be on Facebook when news sources began running the updates, and people
began to clog feeds sharing every update.
I went to bed, upset at the events but figuring I would get better
information tomorrow after the news hawks had done their job, and nearly fell
out of my chair when I saw the name of the alleged shooter. I do not know Frazier Glenn Miller. I have never met the man in person, and I
would not have known him if he sat by me on the bus. However, once upon a time I did speak with
him. And believe me, once was enough. Our conversation was so memorable that years
later I recognized his name immediately.
You never forget your first psycho.
About six
years ago, I joined an experimental group of writers who were brought together
to represent different opinions and viewpoints for a local publication. I was in the first group to go in, and
through some crossed wires, my cell phone number was given out to a couple of
people by mistake. One of those people
was Frazier Glenn Miller, who asked to speak with someone about a lack of news
coverage. That’s just the kind of thing
we were created to cover. I was
surprised that I got an actual phone call, but grabbed a pen and notepad and
began jotting notes. Novice or not, I
wasn’t stupid. Someone was calling me
with a story and I wanted to get it right.
What I heard
that night was an upsetting mix of conspiracy theories gone wrong, hate and
stubborn stupidity. Anything that did
not meet his theory was rejected outright for being biased. Meanwhile, he ignored anything inconvenient and
considered himself an expert. What in the
world made him call a woman, I’ll never know.
I cannot tell you how many times I bristled and wondered what to do. I don’t remember now how I set him off, only
that he eventually turned belligerent and ultimately threatening. I finally ended the call, and after I
regained my composure I emailed our contact and let him know what had
happened. Immediately, our information
was protected and there were no further incidents. When the name of the caller was mentioned at
our next meeting, there was a hush and a feeling something weird had
happened. I got a glossy explanation at
the time, but even back then Miller was outspoken and of concern. He was scary, loud and persistent and dangerous, he knew my name and my picture had just been published alongside my bio. I was escorted to
my car the remainder of our meetings.
When my term was up, I think they were a little relieved, right up until
Frazier applied for membership.
I thought
about Miller several times over the years.
I still hear him, every time I read about how the [insert minority] has
[insert ridiculous accusation]. When the
Tea Party was at its peak, I told a friend from those days how much their
stupidity sounded like it had been written my Miller. That friend agreed, and he is a
Republican. Miller isn’t just a lone nut
from a small town. He’s everywhere. He’s spreading lies, fear and hate because he’s
angry and it’s all he knows. He stirs
terror and paranoia, a black hole who sucks goodness out of the world with
purpose. He is the opposite of
everything I stand for and fights against everything I love. But now I’ll always think of him, and every
time I hear people marginalized by hate wrapped with lies I will hear the echo
of his voice. That snap. That anger.
That need to see that hate in others to validate its existence. That’s Frazier Glenn Miller in a nutshell, and it didn’t
take a genius to figure him out.
If we are to be afraid of men like Frazier Glenn Miller, let it be for the right reason. Not because they are oddities or exceptions,
but because they are everywhere. For example, the mayor of Marionville, Missouri
says he agrees with Miller's views, just not the killing. I'm glad he clarified where his line of decency is. I sure as hell had a hard time finding it without help. While trying to speak for Miller's character, the mayor said he was very respectful of his elders, as long as they were the right color.
This is what passes for upright character in the world, and don't you dare forget it. If you're a woman, a minority, or a non-approved religion you can pay with your life if you slip for even a second in the presence of men like this. Miller didn't get to this point all by himself. He came with friends, liars and hatemongers who came before him and paved the way. He will be followed by more of the same, and if unchecked and ignored we'll be here next week mourning different victims who died for the same ridiculous reason.