Showing posts with label Practical Stupidity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Practical Stupidity. Show all posts

Sunday, August 20, 2023

Sunday Long Read: Returning, To Basics

The logistics of managing returning products to retailers is literally a trillion-dollar industry in America's consumerist culture, and in our Sunday Long Read this week, the New Yorker's David Owen explores the growing reverse supply chain of stuff we send back every day.

The twentysomething daughter of a friend of mine recently ordered half a dozen new dresses. She wasn’t planning to keep the lot; she’d been invited to the wedding of a college classmate and knew in advance that she was going to send back all but the one she liked best. “Swimsuits and dresses for weddings—you never buy just one,” Joanie Demer, a co-founder of the Krazy Coupon Lady, a shopping-strategy Web site, told me. For some online apparel retailers, returns now average forty per cent of sales.

Steady growth in Internet shopping has been accompanied by steady growth in returns of all kinds. A forest’s worth of artificial Christmas trees goes back every January. Bags of green plastic Easter grass go back every spring. Returns of large-screen TVs surge immediately following the Super Bowl. People who buy portable generators during weather emergencies use them until the emergencies have ended, and then those go back, too. A friend of mine returned so many digital books to Audible that the company now makes her call or e-mail if she wants to return another. People who’ve been invited to fancy parties sometimes buy expensive outfits or accessories, then return them the next day, caviar stains and all—a practice known as “wardrobing.” Brick-and-mortar shoppers also return purchases. “Petco takes back dead fish,” Demer said. “Home Depot and Lowe’s let you return dead plants, for a year. You just have to be shameless enough to stand in line with the thing you killed.” It almost goes without saying that Americans are the world’s leading refund seekers; consumers in Japan seldom return anything.

Earlier this year, I attended a three-day conference, in Las Vegas, conducted by the Reverse Logistics Association, a trade group whose members deal in various ways with product returns, unsold inventories, and other capitalist jetsam. The field is large and growing. Dale Rogers, a business professor at Arizona State, gave a joint presentation with his son Zachary, a business professor at Colorado State, during which they said that winter-holiday returns in the United States are now worth more than three hundred billion dollars a year. Zachary said, “So one and a half per cent of U.S. G.D.P.—which would be bigger than the G.D.P. of many countries around the world—is just the stuff that people got for Christmas and said, ‘Nah, do they have blue?’ ” The annual retail value of returned goods in the U.S. is said to be approaching a trillion dollars.

Most online shoppers assume that items they return go back into regular inventory, to be sold again at full price. That rarely happens. On the last day of the R.L.A. conference, I joined a “champagne roundtable” led by Nikos Papaioannou, who manages returns of Amazon’s house-brand electronic devices, including Kindles, Echos, and Blink home-security systems. He said that every item that’s returned to Amazon is subjected to what’s referred to in the reverse-logistics world as triage, beginning with an analysis of its condition. I asked what proportion of triaged products are resold as new.

“It’s minimal,” he said. “I’m not going to give you a specific number, because it’s so dependent on the product category. But our approach with this question is that, if the seal has been broken, if the wrap is not intact, then it’s not going back to the shelf.” Even though Papaioannou understands this fact as well as anyone, he said, he often shops the way the rest of us do. When he buys shoes, for example, he typically orders two pairs, a half size apart. In brick-and-mortar stores, a pair of tried-on shoes will be re-boxed and reshelved. “From an Amazon viewpoint, the moment the box opens, you’ve lost the opportunity,” he said.

For a long time, a shocking percentage of online returns were simply junked. The industry term is D.I.F., for “destroy in field.” (The Web site of Patriot Shredding, based in Maryland, says, “Product destruction allows you to protect your organization’s reputation and focus on the future.”) This still happens with cheap clothes, defective gadgets, and luxury items whose brand owners don’t want a presence at Ocean State Job Lot, but, in most product categories, it’s less common than it used to be. Almost all the attendees at the R.L.A. conference, of whom there were more than eight hundred, are involved, in one way or another, in seeking profitable, efficient, and (to the extent possible) environmentally conscionable ways of managing the detritus of unfettered consumerism. “Returns are inherently entrepreneurial,” Fara Alexander, the director of brand marketing at goTRG, a returns-management company based in Miami, told me. She and many thousands of people like her are active participants in the rapidly evolving but still only semi-visible economic universe known as the reverse supply chain.

In a world where more and more products are going digital, existing only online, we demand the same functionality from our analog physical products too, including the ability to just send it back when we're done with it.  Even our consumerism is temporary in the 2020s. We rent apartments, clothes, jobs, entire lives, and return them when we're ready to move on to the next stage, the next place, the next career. We reinvent ourselves regularly to adapt, evolve, and stay ahead of being "destroyed in field".

That includes all our stuff, too. 

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Another Dead Shot Situation

It's a good thing America has 300 million firearms, so that only bad guys get hurt.

Police say a 75-year-old man in Dallas is being charged with Capital Murder after he allegedly shot and killed two neighbors because they had dumped dog feces on his porch.

According to The Dallas Morning News, Chung Kim had repeatedly complained to management at Sable Ridge Apartments that Michelle Jackson and Jamie Stafford, who lived above him, had dumped dog feces on his porch and allowed their dog, Selena, to urinate on the upstairs balcony which dripped down to his patio.

Tension finally boiled over on Monday when Kim was on his patio and shot 31-year-old Jackson multiple times as she stood on the patio above him, police said. He then reportedly went upstairs and shot Stafford, who was also 31, as he was trying to escape. After Stafford fell from the second floor, Kim is accused of going back downstairs and shooting him again.

Of course Second Amendment, so FREEDOM. 

"But Zandar, none of the existing gun control laws on the books could have stopped this senseless murder," you'll say.   And people still die from drunk driving accidents, but nobody ever says "Well, you can't stop drunk driving deaths with laws so why have laws involving drunk driving?"  Furthermore, nobody has large paranoid cults of people screaming "Obama is coming to take my booze!" when this stuff happens, either.

Oh, and has anybody asked if the 75-year old guy had an XBOX yet?  I'm sure it was the fault of video games, right?

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Practical Stupidity: Navigating Customer Service Calls

Yahoo ran an article this morning about how the official problem solver for the Chicago Tribune has learned to work the system.  He only uses his powers for good, but when a person is stuck and needs help, he will coach them on how to work with the system to get what is right.

So let's start there.  Work with the system, to get what is right.  This is not a strategy for milking companies for freebies, or fighting a war because one disgruntled customer doesn't understand their role as a consumer.  I have trained customer service, worked it myself, been on the receiving end of customer service (supposedly) and I know how sales work.  When I call for help, I expect courtesy, a certain level of desire to fix the problem and I am kind when the inevitable upsell offer comes.  I understand, and while I decline I am respectful and easygoing about it.  I have trained people in how to calm upset people, and coach them on how to get through a tough situation.

Still, in my many years of working with people, I have heard things like this:
"I don't want to pay a late fee, but I want a credit from you for taking my time on the phone."
"I am not responsible for this.  I chose to let someone else have full control over my services and so it's clearly not my fault, your company should take a loss to fix it."
"I've been a loyal customer since [insert year]."

Here's the deal: businesses have to get paid for their services.  Late fees can certainly cross the line of common sense, but if you pay late expect some kind of penalty.  Understand that the person you speak with on the phone is unable to write corporate policy.  Just because you don't think it's fair doesn't mean you are always right.  Credit for your time on the phone, or compensation for your stamps, or compensation for your incredible inconvenience of having to handle your affairs is unlikely and will never be as much as you would like to bill yourself out for.  Yes, businesses appreciate loyal customers but it goes both ways.  You have paid for a great service and gotten one, so the idea that paying your bill is some huge act of charity is hogwash.

Let's have a little chat about responsibility.  Businesses can screw up, when millions of bills are printed you know there will be a few errors.  However, it's the consumer's responsibility to look over their bill and understanding it before paying.  I have listened to this argument for years: that a bill has been incorrect every month for a year or more and because the customer just now noticed and believes it's unfair they should be credited for everything, pronto.  If your adorable little snowflake called China, you are responsible for the charges.  If you let your toddler chew on your cell phone or pound on the computer with his adorable plastic hammer (I'm not kidding!) then you are responsible.  If your purse is stolen or a butterfly in Jerusalem fluttered its wings and caused you to drop something breakable, that may not be your fault.  Rest assured it isn't the fault of the poor sap you're nagging for a refund, either.

This article is right on, and correct.  It doesn't allow for the fact that the customer isn't always right or even slightly reasonable.  It tells you to call back (which is correct) but it doesn't tell you that customer service agents have a time goal, customer callback goal and other standards that determine anything from their paycheck to their consideration for promotion.  Asking nicely for their ID number will up their accountability, because lying about that information is a serious no-no.

The golden rule for getting good customer service is simple: don't be a dick.  Don't talk to the agent like a servant.  Show basic respect and cooperate with them.  Do your homework, such has having a bill in front of you.  Answer their questions honestly so they can get to the bottom of the matter quickly.  You may disagree with the company, but know the person who is trying to help you is not responsible for the situation that has upset you.  Show a little grace before you demand it from them.  I know many agents who do the minimum required to help customers, but don't go above and beyond for those who start screaming and demanding right off the bat.  And why should they?

Friday, June 3, 2011

Practical Stupidity: Flyin' High Edition

How do you combat The Stupid?  By learning things.  So for those who may like to stock up with random facts, or even send it to a friend as an "I told you so" for random water cooler conversation, this tag is for you.


Today's practical bit of wisdom involves airports, flying, and some myths.  The article also explains some changes from how the good old days of travel used to work.  Those who travel often won't find any surprises here, but those who have waited a while may be in for a surprise.


My greatest surprise was that something had been changed in favor of the traveler:


You might get a big payout, if you're involuntarily bumped and if you can't be quickly accommodated on another flight. In fact, starting in August when the rates go up, you could get as much as $1,300 in cash for being booted from an overbooked flight, but if you're rebooked on a plane that gets you to your destination within one hour of the originally scheduled arrival time, you get zip.


By the way, a big boo and hiss to ABC News for their site forcing you to sit through a commercial without the ability to mute it.  Not only is it rude, but it's going to put a major dent in their from work web traffic.  
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