Sunday, May 29, 2011

Heimdall Has A Ridiculous Spot Score Before He Touches The Dice

Saw several movies over the course of my vacation, so we'll start with Thor.



http://www.thinkhero.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/thor-movie-image-600x400.jpg

Thor, played by Australian actor Chris Hemsworth, is very very large. He's also a completely self-absorbed jagoff, but his dad being Odin (Anthony Hopkins, devouring entire cubic parsecs of screen when he's on it) means he gets to get away with it.  His emo-tastic brother Loki (Tom Hiddleston) really despises him, but Thor is too busy to hear this important plot point over the deafening sound of how completely awesome he is.  They all live in Asgard, which is like Mt. Olympus, only in space and with Heimdall (Edris Ilba), a really big dude with a Spot skill score and feats all blown on Spot score, who is relegated to doorman. (Thanks, Marvel.)

When Thor and his buddies are manipulated into declaring war on the Frost Giants in the realm next door, and breaking Odin's peace with their leader King Laufey, it ruins everyone's week and he is banished to Earth along with HIS MIGHTY HAMMER MJOLNIR until he Learns Something(tm).  He meets Dr. Jane Foster (Natalie Portman) and has wacky adventures involving drinking and fighting, which are apparently the top, bolded points on his resume'.

Meanwhile, the shock of just how much of a muscle-brained meathead his son is has put Odin into some sort of Asgardian Space Coma, and Loki takes over.  Thor then has to save Asgard and Earth and everything, completely predictable but actually amusing and fun due to the fact Chris Hemsworth is really, really perfect for Thor (even better than Robert Downey Jr. was as Tony Stark) and that Natalie Portman really does try hard to be an actress and not an arm accessory for the big guy.  Tolstoy this ain't, but as far as a matinee popcorn flick, it's a good time.

Do stay for the credits and the obligatory Nick Fury scene afterwards.

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