A Special Kind Of Stupid

Scary rides push physics to the limit.  If you are not smart enough to calculate the physics involved, please be smart enough to follow the directions of those who can.  Simple enough, no?

VALENCIA, CALIF.A man who fell off the tallest enclosed water slide in California has "miraculously" survived with no broken bones or internal injuries, according to the L.A. County Sheriff's department.

CBS station KCBS-TV in Los Angeles reported that an unidentified 19-year-old man was rushed to the hospital after falling off the Venom Drop at Six Flags Hurricane Harbor. The 75-foot tall water slide is one of the three slides at Black Snake Summit, and allows riders to "take a virtually vertical plunge, almost 90 degrees to the ground," according to the official description. The man was about halfway down the slide when he fell off and hit the concrete, Six Flags spokesperson Sue Carpenter said.

He went head-first, and derailed enough to land on the concrete.  My father used to say God favored stupid people and drunks, and I'll be darned if that hasn't panned out more often than not.  This stupid man could have died, and instead walked away with no major injuries.  Not a broken bone, no complications.

So I'm jealous.  The last time I took a wrong step I was using a cane for six weeks.  I'm also terrified of water rides, because I don't trust the variables.  This pretty much confirms that I'll never be riding anything scarier than the Lazy River.  Besides a great spider invasion, this pretty much tops my list of terrifying scenarios.

If I could tell this young man anything, I'd spin a web and tell him in my best
 Spider-Man voice, "everybody gets one."