Friday, May 31, 2013

How Much For Just One Rib?

The answer to Chris Rock's eternal question in I'm Gonna Git You Sucka is apparently "three to five years, and fifty for the rack."


All Willie Smith Ward wanted was his baby-back ribs, but it cost him 50 years in prison.
His problems started when he tucked a large rack under his shirt and tried to leave the H-E-B store at 1102 Speight Ave. without paying in September 2011.


A jury in Waco’s 19th State District Court also didn’t like the 43-year-old Ward’s previous five felony and four misdemeanor convictions and recommended that Ward be sentenced to 50 years in prison as a habitual criminal.

Jurors took two minutes Wednesday to convict Ward on robbery charges and about an hour to decide his punishment.

Ward’s theft of the $35 rack of pork ribs turned into a robbery when he threatened a grocery store employee who saw the huge bulge under Ward’s shirt and tried to stop him in the parking lot.

“This verdict shows that the citizens of this county will not tolerate a continued disrespect and disregard for other people and their property,” said Assistant District Attorney J.R. Vicha, who prosecuted Ward with Chris Bullajian. “People who choose to do so will be dealt with seriously and appropriately.”

50 years for a rack of ribs is "serious and appropriate"?

Willie Smith Ward 

Oh, NOW it is, right?

2 comments:

  1. After nine convictions, some additional time seems warranted. Perpetual criminal activity gets tiresome after a while - and given the history of "previous felony convictions for burglary, attempted robbery, aggravated assault, leaving the scene of an accident and possession of cocaine and four misdemeanor convictions, including two thefts...", it seems likely that he'd have spent most of the next 20-50 years in prison, anyway (he turned down a plea bargain for a 20-year sentence). However, I'd also be willing to bet that Texas hasn't done much to help this guy choose an alternative career path, either.

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  2. “This verdict shows that the citizens of this county will not tolerate a
    continued disrespect and disregard for other people and their
    property."
    - Assistant District Attorney, J.R. Vicha.


    You betcha, J.R.!


    Now, lemmesee...50-years at $25K per = $1,250,000! Seems reasonable for $35 hunk of meat (Really? Ribs cost that much in Waco?) Now, here's your tax increase - to pay for it. Congratulations citizens!

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