Last Call

So apparently according to hew new book, you can thank Jimmy Carter and Gore Vidal for Michele Bachmann.  Personally, I was going to blame the fact she's batshit insane, but that's just me.

The Bachmanns were Jimmy Carter Democrats in those days. But Carter, and the government, soon disappointed. Shocked by the payroll withholdings at a summer newspaper job in college, Bachmann wrote a letter to the Social Security Administration saying she didn’t want to pay the taxes. The reply, according to Bachmann, came in a phone call from Washington telling her she had no choice.

“The caller on the other end of the line said this was coming from the White House!” the book recounts.

Her view of Carter’s failings, along with author Gore Vidal, turned Bachmann into a Republican. Vidal’s role came in the novel “Burr,” with its frank depiction of the nation’s founders, blemishes and all.

“I realized a snide dismissiveness toward American history and American institutions had become the essence and thinking of the chattering-class gatekeepers of the culture,” Bachmann wrote. Complicit with the Democrats, she felt, were the “me too” Republicans who went along with the new Left “antifamily relativists” of the pre-Reagan 1970s.

What the hell is an "antifamily relativist?"  A bachelor who hates kids?  What?  And really, the 70's drove her to become a 50's Republican in 2011?  This woman makes my head hurt, she does.

Here's one book I know I'm not buying for anyone on my shopping list.

Planes, Trains, And Asphalt-Mobiles

Your Turkey Day "travel nightmare story" has nothing on this one.

If you hear about a sticky Thanksgiving travel mess, images of crowded airport security lines and jammed freeway interchanges probably come to mind. Your car sitting on the freeway in a mass of a black goo probably isn't what you think of.

But that's exactly what drivers on the Pennsylvania Turnpike faced Tuesday night after a tanker truck carrying driveway sealant sprang a leak and spread the goo over a 37-mile stretch of highway.

"This is Thanksgiving. Now we have to turn around and go back home," Laura Frick, who was traveling from Cleveland to New Jersey for the holiday, told CNN affiliate WTAE-TV in Pittsburgh. "It's horrible."

The tar-like sealant was spilled in the turnpikes eastbound lanes between the New Castle and Allegheny Valley exits in western Pennsylvania, according to the turnpike's website. The truck's driver noticed the leak when he stopped at the Oakmont travel plaza, according to the WTAE report.

About 200 vehicles were damaged by the sealant, some to the point that they could no longer move, according to a report in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette. Some drivers said the numbers were even higher.

Yep, several hundred cars got their tires mucked up, turned into rolling lumps of melty asphalt goo that of course eventually stopped rolling period.  Just awful if you ask me.  Luckily nobody was hurt but that's going to be a lot of tires...not to mention 37 miles worth of cleanup on the Pennsylvania Turnpike.

Somehow, my Thanksgiving travel stories don't seem so bad anymore.

Now You Can Sleep On It

Insomniacs of the world, unite...and get some sack time.

The US Food and Drug Administration, for the first time, approved Wednesday medication specifically designed for those who wake up in the middle of the night and cannot fall back to sleep.

Intermezzo, manufactured by Transcept Pharmaceuticals of California, is a lower-dose formulation of zolpidem, first approved in the United States in 1992 and better known as the insomnia treatment Ambien.

“This is the first time the FDA has approved a drug for this condition,” the federal government agency said in a statement.

“Intermezzo should only be used when a person has at least four hours of bedtime remaining. It should not be taken if alcohol has been consumed or with any other sleep aid.”

So it's basically low-dose Ambien, and it knocks you out for half the night.  Somebody was paying attention in medical patents class.  I know I've have trouble falling back asleep after waking up at 2-3 AM sometimes.  Nice to know there's something you can do about it.

The holiday season's always a bit rough for me, personally.

10-Year-Old Boy Protects Mother With BB Gun

BELLINGHAM, Wash. -- Police in Bellingham, Wash., say a 10-year-old boy defended his mother from an attacker by shooting him in the face with a BB rifle as many as four times.

Paul R. Newman, the man accused of the attack, rents a room in the woman's home and came home drunk and angry Tuesday morning. Police say he kicked in a bedroom door and started choking the woman, according to Associated Press.

Officers say the boy hit the attacker with a board and then shot him in the face with the pump-action BB rifle as he grappled with the woman.

It's a tough world out there, but this little guy is prepared.  I'm thankful he wasn't hurt, this story has a tendency to repeat itself and the ending isn't always that happy.

Bachmann Has Another StupidiLeak

Michele Bachmann doesn't give a damn about anything our country stands for.  Education, freedom, choice, or Miranda rights for anyone suspected of terrorism.

The thing about rights is everyone has them.  That's what makes them rights, not options.  We should lead by example or be honest about ourselves.  Pretending to be holier than everyone and sinking to new lows is not going to make the problem go away.  If you are right, you know it because you don't have to cheat the system.  Any person detained should know why and a basic understanding of what they can expect.  If we are so obviously right under the circumstances, what do we lose by playing fair?

Michele Bachmann: "This is one thing we know about Barack Obama. He has essentially handed over our interrogation of terrorists to the ACLU. He's outsourced it to them. Our CIA has no ability to have any form of interrogation for terrorists. When the bomber -- or the attempted bomber over Detroit, the underwear bomber -- was intercepted, he was given Miranda warnings within 45 minutes. He was not an American citizen. We don't give Miranda warnings to terrorists, and we don't read them their rights. They don't have any."

In fact, Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, the "underwear bomber" who attempted to blow up a plane on Christmas Day in 2009, was not told of his right to remain silent until after he had stopped talking to law enforcement officials.

As the Los Angeles Times reported in February 2010, "The source said that Abdulmutallab was not read his rights until he made it clear that he was not going to say anything else."

Conservatives have frequently criticized Obama for allowing suspected terrorists to be read their Miranda rights. But the practice is not exclusive to Obama: President George W. Bush did the same thing.

In December 2001, Richard Reid, the so-called "shoe bomber," was "read or reminded of his Miranda rights four times in two days, beginning five minutes after being taken into custody."

You don't deserve rights unless Michele Bachmann approves of you.  What would happen if this troll of a woman ruled the country?  If you don't like her religion, if you don't agree with her, if you don't meet her standards, do you deserve rights?

If you think being a terrorist makes it different, think again.  It could also be people who are merely  suspected of terrorism.  Which, as the GOP has repeatedly shown, is anyone who doesn't fit their description of ideal.  And if they don't have enough dirt on you, they can abuse the Patriot Act to dig until they get it.  There's no layer to protect you or make sure your rights as a citizen are enforced.  In fact, Bachmann makes it clear she views the ACLU as the enemy, and using the totally incorrect but trendy word "outsourcing" to discredit those who stand up for the little guy.

In other words, how she plans to treat terrorists does void our most basic declarations of justice, freedom and due process.  The other news is it's also how she plans to treat the rest of us.

Happy Turkey Day

Gobble, gobble, gobble indeed.  Adam Zyglis of the Buffalo News:

Getting Serious On Syria, Part 3

When the State Department tells all Americans to get the hell out of a foreign country that's been on our naughty list for some time, it's a pretty good sign something new and ugly is coming.  Fast.  Probably involving things that go boom.

The U.S. Embassy in Damascus urged its citizens in Syria to depart "immediately," and Turkey's foreign ministry urged Turkish pilgrims to opt for flights to return home from Saudi Arabia to avoid traveling through Syria.


"The U.S. Embassy continues to urge U.S. citizens in Syria to depart immediately while commercial transportation is available," said a statement issued to the American community in Syria Wednesday and posted on the Embassy's website. "The number of airlines serving Syria has decreased significantly since the summer, while many of those airlines remaining have reduced their number of flights."

Yeah folks, this isn't a "maybe you should think this over", this is "get the hell out of Dodge before the bombs start falling."  Picking a fight with Syria means Iran gets involved, and Iran getting involved means Russia and China get involved.  Russia at least is already making loud noises of its own.

Russia threatened on Wednesday to deploy missiles to target the U.S. missile shield in Europe if Washington fails to assuage Moscow's concerns about its plans, a harsh warning that reflected deep cracks in U.S.-Russian ties despite President Barack Obama's efforts to "reset" relations with the Kremlin.

President Dmitry Medvedev said he still hopes for a deal with the U.S. on missile defense, but he strongly accused Washington and its NATO allies of ignoring Russia's worries. He said Russia will have to take military countermeasures if the U.S. continues to build the shield without legal guarantees that it will not be aimed against Russia.

The Russians aren't stupid.  They know what's coming and they're telegraphing two, three moves down the chessboard right off the bat, going straight to "You really don't want to do this, pal."  Believe me, the two issues are related.

Most likely this is just before some sort of NATO/UN sanctions are leveled as the Arab League's no-fly zone (led by Turkey) might be shaping up sooner rather than later and Russia is just driving around with full beams on all the time, making a show.  On the other hand, the Russians are clearly looking for a fight right now if anybody other than the Arab League gets involved.

Just the same, Tyler Durden notes we've moved an aircraft carrier group over to Syria this week.

StupidiNews, Thanksgiving Edition!

• Yemeni President Ali Abdullah Saleh has agreed to a deal brokered by Saudi Arabia that means he'll hand over power to his Vice-President in 90 days.
• A Malaysian tribunal has found former President George W. Bush and British PM Tony Blair guilty of war crimes in a symbolic conviction.
• Pakistan's new ambassador to the US is a former humans right advocate, a day after her predecessor was recalled over a controversial deal with America.
• NBA owners and players plan another round of talks this week in order to try to salvage the 2011-2012 season.
• Apple's iPad 3 is expected to have twice the screen resolution of the current model according to new parts specs.

Last Call

Here's some nice depressing news before we go for the night:

The average Bush tax cut in 2011 for a taxpayer in the richest one percent is greater than the average income of the other 99 percent ($66,384 compared to $58,506).

You see why the GOP will do anything to protect the one percenters from the rest of us.  A whole lof ot Republican fat cats on Capitol Hill fall into that 1% to boot.

Happy Thanksgiving, indeed.

An Open (Wide) And Shut Case

I'm trying to figure out why we need a blue-ribbon commission here to determine what happened in the UC Davis pepper spray case, but that's the way the UC Davis admins want to play it.

Former LAPD Chief William J. Bratton will head a UC-sponsored investigation into the controversial pepper spraying of student protesters last week at UC Davis, university officials announced Tuesday.

Bratton is to lead an independent review of the incident and report results within a month, said UC President Mark G. Yudof. Bratton, who also served as police chief in New York City, now heads the New York-based Kroll security consulting firm.

The goal is to provide “an independent, unvarnished report about what happened at Davis,” Yudof said in a statement.

The results are "Lt. John Pike pepper sprayed a bunch of students sitting on the sidewalk like they were offending weeds growing between the cracks" and that Chancellet Linda Katehi should resign.  It's not really that hard, guys.  Katehi's too busy blaming her campus police to take responsibility.  Funny how that works.

Sheesh.

Mittens Goes All In On The Media

The Romney campaign response to their latest false attack ad?  You paid attention to us, ergo we win.

The offending moment comes when Obama says "if we keep talking about the economy, we're going to lose." That was a quote from a way-too-honest McCain adviser that Obama loved to repeat on the trail. By evening, the ad had been attacked, derided, parodied, and ruled "pants on fire" worthy by Politifact. The Romney campaign could have cared less.

"We want to engage the president," explained Romney spokesman Eric Fehrnstrom in the spin room. "We look at him as our rival. It's all deliberate; it was all very intentional."

Romney adviser Ron Kaufman, an RNC committee member and longtime operative, simply said that the ad "worked."

"They always squeal the most when you hold a mirror up to them," he said, "and they overreacted, clearly. All they did was make the ad more effective."

"There was a time when the Obama campaign had real discipline," joked Stuart Stevens, a senior Romney strategist. "Today was a total meltdown. You had the press secretary to the president of the United States talking about an ad that was running on one station in New Hampshire. There was a time when Jay [Carney, a former reporter for Time] wouldn't even have written about this. Total meltdown. It's as if you have somebody on a witness stand, accused of anger management issues, and he jumps off the stand and comes after you."

If the President's camp ignores the lies, Team Romney claims victory.  If they respond, Team Romney claims victory.  No matter what, Team Romney claims victory.  It's how spin works.

Why is anyone surprised that the McCain-Palin campaign model is exactly what Romney is following, with a year left to go?  Prepare for more as Romney continues to declare himself the default GOP candidate.

Of course, the far right isn't exactly going down without a fight, either.  The Village's response to Romney's victory lap?  Ugly.

Representatives for leading social conservative groups in Iowa held a secret meeting Monday as part of an effort with one main goal: find and support a Republican presidential candidate who can stop Mitt Romney in Iowa.


The idea: avoid splintering the conservative vote in the state by rallying around one GOP rival who could win Iowa's Jan. 3 caucus and then challenge Romney in New Hampshire and the other early voting states.

Many social conservatives and other religious leaders in the state have openly labeled the former Massachusetts governor as a "flip-flopper," a criticism the campaign frequently beats back, while others have seen Romney's Mormon faith as an issue. And many of them have openly hoped for someone to emerge as a viable alternative to the former Massachusetts governor.

CNN reached out to the Romney campaign for reaction to the secret meeting and the overall anti-Romney effort.

Anybody But Romney is now officially pulling into high gear, and right now that "anybody" is Newt Gingrich.  Should get interesting here.

The Newest Fear Regarding Gay Marriage... Marrying The Eiffel Tower?

One of the oldest tricks in the book when it comes to scaring people into not supporting gay marriage is using the "slippery slope" method.

You tell people that if gay marriage is made legal, it's only a matter of time before the state or country will be full of polygamists or men marrying turtles, as Bill O'Reilly has suggested, or, as Michele Bachmann's new Iowa campaign Co-Chair, Tamara Scott, is warning, women marrying the Eiffel Tower.

In a new video, brought to our attention by RightWingWatch.org, Scott, who also serves as the director of Iowa's Concern Women for America chapter, speaks with Bob Vander Plaats, the head of The Family Leader.

Because that's a real concern. A slippery slope I'd like to see is what we would have if the GOP stopped telling people how they should conduct their private lives. Let that slip into people making decisions, and slip into people being responsible for their decisions, and the next thing you know we would have independent adults who can (gasp) make their own choices.

I would be ashamed to have my name attached to this as anything but the person who mocked it publicly.

Dumbasses.

Bachmann: The Musical

NEW YORK -- Jimmy Fallon's house band The Roots appear not to be fans of Republican presidential contender Michele Bachmann.

As Bachmann strode on to the stage for an appearance on Fallon's "Late Night" early Tuesday, the show's band played a snippet of a Fishbone song called "Lyin' Ass Bitch."

The song begins with a distinctive "la la la la la la la la la" refrain - the only words audible before Bachmann, smiling and waving to the audience, sat down. The song itself, about a relationship gone wrong, isn't political.

So I'm old and out of touch with new music.  This might be enough to bring me back and support The Roots, just for having a  rocking sense of humor.

The Latest Pyramid Scheme

Egypt's ruling military council is promising to turn things over to a civilian government next June rather than December 2012, but that's not good enough for Cairo protesters who wisely aren't buying it.

Egypt's army chief, seeking to defuse street protests that have left 37 dead, promised a swifter handover to civilian rule but failed to convince thousands of hardcore demonstrators, some of whom battled police through the night.

One man was killed in clashes early on Wednesday in the second city Alexandria, one of several towns that saw unrest.

Field Marshal Mohamed Hussein Tantawi, who has run the ruling military council since mass protests unseated his long-time ally Hosni Mubarak in February, made a faltering televised address on Tuesday in which he promised a civilian president would be elected in June, about six months sooner than planned.

Confirming Egypt's first free parliamentary election in decades will start on Monday, the council also accepted the resignation of the civilian prime minister and his cabinet, who had incensed democrats with a short-lived proposal that the army remain beyond civilian control under any new constitution.

But Tantawi angered many of the youthful demonstrators on Cairo's Tahrir Square and in other cities by suggesting a referendum on whether military rule should end earlier - a move many saw as a ploy to appeal to the many Egyptians who fear further upheaval and to divide those from the young activists.

Egypt's protesters want civilian rule ASAP.  June's not going to cut it, either.  This is going to get ugly, fast, folks.

Through A Teleprompter, Dorkly

At this point we've taken a right turn at the evil mirror universe and ended up in the really, really sad reality where a major party "frontrunner" is lying about their own name.

Responding to Wolf Blitzer’s own self-introduction — in which Wolf said “and yes, that is my real name” — Romney began: “I’m Mitt Romney — and yes Wolf, that’s also my first name.”

Except Romney’s first name is “Willard,” and “Mitt” is his middle name.

Franz Kafka would have cracked by now, Francis Bacon would have run from the room screaming, and I'm pretty sure Oscar Wilde would have chewed off his own leg after just three of these debates.  Makes me feel pretty good about my being able to continue to stomach the Abyss here, but it's not just staring back, it has position papers written by Cthulhu.

It's enough to drive a man mad.