StupidiNews, Weekend Edition

• Obama has reportedly tapped Utah's Republican Governor, Jon Hunstman, as ambassador to China.
• At Gitmo, abuses of detainees allegedly continue under the auspices of the facility's fast-reaction force, known as the "black shirts."
• A rising Islamist offensive in Somalia is pushing that country's government close to collapse.
• India's ruling Congress Party has won an overwhelming victory in national elections.
• The US Department of Energy is spending its stimulus money on training engineers to capture carbon.