Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Dressing Room With A Moose

Fresh off the news that America's Favorite Alaskan Grifter Celebrity (Griftebrity is your portmanteau of the day, kids) has pulled down $12 million since July, we now find out what kind of demands this rising North Star wants (h/t Yggy)
Six pages of the contract Palin’s handlers sent to Cal State Stanislaus were unearthed in a dumpster by students there this week, and one of the many requirements that must be met for the former vice presidential hopeful: two unopened bottles of still water and “bendable straws” must be waiting on a wooden lectern.
That was just one item among the pages of elaborate demands that must be met to land a contract for Palin to come speak at an event. More costly were the requirement for her travel – the venue must supply her with business or first class commercial airfare, or with a private plane. And not just any jet will do.
“The private aircraft MUST BE a Lear 60 or larger (as defined by interior cabin space) for West Coast Events; or, a Hawker 800 or Larger (as defined by interior cabin space for) East Coast Events, and both are subject to the Speaker’s approval. The Speaker Reserves the right to change the flight plans at any time,” the contract states.
 One, the irony of Cal State Stanislaus being able to afford Sarah Palin's Lear jet, but not being able to afford a quality paper shredder to get rid of contracts involving Sarah Palin and Lear jets, is just hysterical.

Two, the bendable straws are clearly so Sarah Palin can enjoy her bottled water without being distracted by looking down at her beverage of choice, which could cost her dearly should Vladimir Putin choose that moment to rear his head in the airspace over her lectern.



You laugh.  Vladimir Putin knows enough Judo to kill you. Sarah Palin?  Always prepared.  Even while Griftebriting around the globe in a Lear jet.
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