I'll Have Crazy, Hold The Mustard, And A Koch

I'm not sure what's more frightening on this whole David Koch/Scott Walker/Buffalo Beast prank call "identity theft" story, the theory that billionaire David Koch can't find any better lawyers than Col. Mustard and is actually soliciting his legal advice, or the theory that billionaire David Koch has hundreds of better lawyers at his disposal and he's still running with this.

Conservative billionaire David Koch says the Gonzo journalist who impersonated him in a recent prank call heard across the nation may be guilty of identity theft.

"It's a case of identity theft," Koch told the New York Times in a rare interview Friday. "I didn’t even know his name before this brouhaha erupted."

Identity theft is a serious crime, but it's unclear whether a prank call falls under the category -- the concept typically refers to assuming someone's identity to make purchases or commit crimes, according to the Justice Department.

In the widely-publicized call whose audio was published, Buffalo Beast editor Ian Murphy spoke to Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker (R) for 20 minutes while pretending to be Koch, discussing the high-profile clash with public employee unions and offering to help the governor.

The real Koch joked to the paper he was surprised Walker took even took the call.

"I was thinking to myself, 'My God, if I called up a senator or a congressman to discuss something with them, and they heard 'David Koch is on the line,' they’d immediately say, 'That’s that fraud again — tell him to get lost!'" he said.

Nice, he throws Walker under the bus to boot.  The Koch Brothers have the whole Lex Luthor thing down cold.  Really hard to dislike a guy when he's throwing a cancer research center at you.

Seriously, we're going to go with identity theft here?  Fire your legal team, Koch.  Buy a new one.  Trust me.