Don't Bite The Hand That... Well, You Know

Okay, the title made me laugh.  But this is a serious story for a few reasons.  Normally, I wouldn't dive into a married couple's issue like this but since they went public I figure it's all up for grabs.

A former top Alabama official who campaigned against gay marriage in his failed bid for governor has donated sperm to several lesbian couples in New Zealand while doing earthquake-recovery work, according to The New Zealand Herald. His wife described the news as "the utmost of betrayal."

Bill Johnson, 52, who describes himself as a conservative Christian, used an online alias to meet women wanting to get pregnant, the paper says. He said he could not have biological children with his wife, Kathy, who had a hysterectomy before they married in 2004. She has three children from a previous relationship.

There's a lot more going on. His wife didn't know he was doing this, and he says he believes she knew he would continue donating. It's hard to imagine a miscommunication like that, but I digress. His wife is pissed and doesn't even pretend to be flexible on the matter.

"My heart is broken. I told Bill when I talked to him this morning after receiving your call that I simply can't talk. I can't even breathe.

"I have no idea what life holds for us in the coming days."

"He knows I am shocked and deeply hurt and even angry. It's not something a wife ever wants to experience. It's very personal and very tragic and we'll have to work through this as a family.

"I just can't believe this could be true. I don't believe he would put the reputation he has earned at risk by acting in such an irresponsible, selfish manner."

Well now, wait a minute now. Someone with that stance probably didn't misunderstand or fail to clarify her feelings on the subject. You don't do something like this without the full consent of your spouse, period. He has opened their family up to legal, ethical and financial peril and it sounds like he at the very least pushed the boundaries of what is preferred from donor parents. It's actually a cool thing to do, when your own partner is comfortable with it and has been in on the process. It's a really crappy thing to blindside someone with and then ask how they feel. They feel lied to and violated, and the fact that (hopefully) happy healthy babies are now with parents who really want them won't diminish the betrayal.

Now knowing what the future holds says enough.  Happy babies, lying jackass, I'm so conflicted about how to tag this one.