StupidiNews, Weekend Edition!

• The European Union has leveled new sanctions directly against the assets of Syrian strongman Bashar al-Assad and his family.
• New email evidence shows former MF Global CEO Jon Corzine transferred $200 million from a customer's account as the hedge fund firm collapsed.
• The IRS is going after the people with the money: 30% of multimillionaire tax returns were audited last year.
• US companies are now sitting on a record $3.6 trillion in cash, a new record, as record corporate profits continue.
• AT&T is scolding the FCC, saying its scuttled mega-merger with T-Mobile could have saved its rival thousands of jobs.