StupidiNews!

• American missionary Kenneth Bae, captured by North Korea and sentenced to 15 years of hard labor, has been hospitalized, according to his sister.
• Attorney General Eric Holder is expected to announce a major new initiative to change federal prosecutions of non-violent drug offenders to eliminate mandatory prison sentences.
• The State Department has reopened embassies closed last week due to terror threats, but embassies in Pakistan and Yemen remained closed.
• Economists are cautiously expecting slight growth in the Eurozone economy for 2Q 2013, after six straight quarters of recession.
• Apple's next iPhone reveal is expected September 10th, according to sources, with a completely revamped iOS7.