StupidiNews, Memorial Day Edition

• Billionaire Petro Poroshenko has won Ukraine's election for President, the so-called "Chocolate King" getting 56% of the vote.
• Just days after Britain hard-right UKIP party made local election gains, French right-wing nationalist party National Front scored major victories in EU parliamentary elections.
• President Obama will speak at the commencement ceremony at West Point on Wednesday, where he is expected to lay out a defense of his six years of foreign policy gains.
• Officials in Shanghai are warning children and the elderly to stay indoors as smog alerts continue to plague the Chinese capital. 
• The US government is considering restricting Chinese nationals from attending the DefCon and BlackHat hacker conferences this year in order to "curb Chinese espionage".