StupidiNews, Weekend Edition!

• Officials in Portland are asking nearly 700,000 residents to boil tap water due to fears of E coli bacteria in the water supply.
• Pope Francis arrives in Jordan today for the start of his Middle East trip that will include both Israel and the Palestinian territories.
• The US has suspended aid to Thailand after this week's military coup in Bangkok as the Thai army has removed and detained PM Yingluck Shinawatra.
• The S&P 500 Index closed at a record high, above the 1,900 mark for the first time as a jump in new home purchases in April rallied the markets.
• Hewlett-Packard will be cutting 16,000 more jobs in 2014, raising total cost-cutting measures this year to 50,000 layoffs.