StupidiNews!

• Both NY House Democrat Charlie Rangel and MS GOP Senator Thad Cochran appear to have won their respective primaries last night by very slim margins.
• Ohio Republican Rep. Steve Stivers has accepted the resignation of his chief of staff, Adam Kuhn, after Kuhn's former girlfriend posted a picture of his penis on Twitter yesterday.
• Russia's upper chamber of parliament has agreed to revoke President Vladimir Putin's authorization to use military force to intervene in Ukraine as a gesture of goodwill.
• Meanwhile, White House officials are preparing a new round of sanctions against Russian energy and technology firms, sanctions that EU lawmakers may be very reluctant to agree to.
• A federal judge has found the process to challenge America's "no-fly list" unconstitutional, saying that DHS officials must disclose why a person was placed on the list in the first place.