StupidiNews, Labor Day Edition!

• China has voted to change Hong Kong's election process, declaring that only pre-approved candidates may run for the territory's Chief Executive.
• Bavarian bakers are threatening to go on strike during Germany's Oktoberfest, which could affect the festival's famed pretzels.
• Russian President Vladimir Putin is calling for talks on "statehood" for annexed Ukrainian territory, but stopped short of endorsing rebel independence from the Ukrainian government.
• Chinese search giant Alibaba is delaying its US stock offering for a couple of weeks due to questions from securities regulators.
• A British artist is experimenting with a "personal messaging app" that sends an actual person to relay a message to users.