You're Not Panicking Enough, Citizen

SCARY BETURBANED HORDE IS SCARY AND ALSO EVERYWHERE.

A key U.S. senator said Sunday that Americans have to assume there are some "sleeper cells" within the U.S. that would like to carry out a terror attack. 

Sen. Ron Johnson (R-Wis.) said he was not aware of any specific cells, but noted that the recent attacks elsewhere in the Western world make it a safe assumption. Johnson is chairman of the Senate Homeland Security and Government Affairs Committee. 

“What you’re seeing happen in Europe, you’re seeing how widespread that is,” he said on “Fox News Sunday.” “I think you have to assume that that is a risk that we have to consider.”

We're not at war with Islam, we just want you to assume that your Muslim neighbors may be sleeper agents who will kill you and your family.

Sen. Ben Cardin (D-Md.), a member of the Foreign Relations Committee, said U.S. intelligence needs to focus on the greatest threats to home. 

“In some cases these are Americans that we know have been associated with these extreme groups,” he said. “It’s really important that our intelligence community focus on those that are the highest risks to the United States.”

You know, brown people with funny hats.

We will be expecting evidence of the proper minimum of urine soaking your clothing in our next report, citizen.  Please make sure you and your loved ones are pissing themselves as much as possible over Terrah.