StupidiNews!

• In a 5-4 decision by Chief Justice Roberts, the US Supreme Court overturned a lower court ruling and declared absentee ballots in Wisconsin's primary must be postmarked by tomorrow.
• The NBA is looking into rapid COVID-19 testing of players, referees, and officials in order to get televised games without fans back on the air to resume the 2020 season.
• UK PM Boris Johnson has been moved to intensive care as his COVID-19 symptoms have worsened, Johnson has deputized Tory minister Dominic Raab to take over if needed.
• Nancy Pelosi is looking for at least $1 trillion in direct stimulus to Americans to help with deteriorating economic conditions once the House returns to work on Monday.
• Linguistic historians have found the earliest known recorded use of the "f-word" in Scottish manuscripts from more than 500 years ago.