Sunday, June 6, 2010

The Tony Awards For Chutzpah

BP CEO Tony Hayward?  Not gonna quit, nope.
BP PLC chief executive Tony Hayward said Sunday he won't step down over the Gulf of Mexico oil spill, and predicted his company will recover from the disaster.
Hayward told BBC television's "Andrew Marr Show" that he would not quit, and he had the "absolute intention of seeing this through to the end."

"We are going to stop the leak. We're going to clean up the oil, we're going to remediate any environmental damage and we are going to return the Gulf coast to the position it was in prior to this event," Hayward said. "That's an absolute commitment, we will be there long after the media has gone, making good on our promises."
Somehow I'm betting the percentage of people who believe Hayward's statement here is equal to two things: the percentage of people who believe Hayward will still be BP's CEO in twelve months, and the percentage of people who thought Hot Tub Time Machine represented actual science.

On the other hand, what do people expect Hayward to say?  "I'm a complete bastard, I take full responsibility for this catastrophe, it's my fault as the man behind BP's corporate culture of cutting safety corner to make a profit and I'm resigning immediately out of shame and hope only that whatever higher power out there sees fit to forgive me as I spend the rest of my natural life trying to make amends, starting with donating my salary for this year to the clean-up effort"?

Sure.  Lemme just start up this hot tub and see if I end up in 1986.

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