Saturday, June 5, 2010

Zandar's Thought Of The Day

Is this story a good thing, or a bad thing?
A San Bernardino mother whose children were kidnapped 15 years ago was able to finally track them down using Facebook.

San Bernardino’s Deputy District Attorney says it’s the first time his office has handled a case like this one. But in this digital age, it may not be the last.

Faustino Utrera, father of two toddlers, a boy and girl, vanished with them in 1995. Their mother reported them missing and 15 years passed. "At the time, they were 2 and 3 years old. So they’re now 17 and 16," said Kurt Rowley, San Bernardino Deputy District Attorney.

But in those years, the Internet exploded and social networking sites revolutionized the process of tracking people down.

"The mother got on to Facebook and typed in one of the children’s names and hit a Facebook page," said Rowley.

It was her daughter, and they started corresponding. The mother even sent the teenager a family photo, dating back to before the split. But the relationship stalled. "The teenager said, 'Not interested in a relationship. We just have a happy life. Leave us alone,'" said Rowley.

The teen’s Facebook page disappeared. The mother, who still lives in San Bernardino, contacted Rowley and his investigators. They tracked the Facebook profile and the girl to Orlando, Fla.

Utrera was then arrested and is now charged with two counts of kidnapping, and two counts of violating child custody orders.

As for the mother and her children, they will have to build a new relationship.

"There is no relationship there," said Carrie Hoeppner of the Florida Department of Children & Families. "You don't have that immediate joyful reunification. If in fact that is what will progress, it will take time. These children will have to build a relationship, and that is something that will not happen overnight."
I have mixed feelings about this. On one hand, a mother finally found her missing children after a decade and a half. On the other hand, these kids had a life with their father and were essentially raised by him, and now he's in jail and they have a mother they haven't seen in 15 years.

Which was better for the kids, the life they had or the one they have now?  The law clearly sides with the mother here but...is justice being served here?  Is there any justice to be served in a situation like this?

2 comments:

Bon said...

He broke the law. The kids are now suffering as a direct result of his actions. The mother had every right to her kids. If she was unfit, there are legal options to declare her as such and protect the children. Even imperfect people should have access to their children. In this case, the mother's right to love and know her children was taken away without a chance for her to be heard in court.

We find comfort in our routine, and safety in predictability. Who knows what sort of information these kids were presented over the last 15 years? Justice IS being served here. Justice doesn't mean a happy ending. Just because the kids showed initial resistance doesn't mean it was more than an immediate reflex to protect the safety of their current lives.

The custody orders have to be obeyed, or we are encouraging every parent who wants sole custody to kidnap and run.
However, I am curious about the extremely neutral reaction from Florida C&F. For them to be that hands off, there could likely be something wrong we don't know. But again, court is the place to address that. Not on the run, and not after this woman and her kids were deprived of fifteen years of opportunity. I can say that my mother had her issues. But I'd give anything for just one more minute with her, imperfect or not.

Just my two cents.

Bonlet

StarStorm said...

I'm inclined to agree with Bon. She had every right to be with her children, and the father just basically said "fuck you" and ran.

Justice was done, but justice isn't always pleasant.

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