StupidiNews!

• A third night of widespread looting, rioting, and violence spread across the UK last night, leading to over 450 arrests and a country on edge.
• House Speaker John Boehner and minority leader Nancy Pelosi have agreed to end the 180-year-old House page program, citing cost and technology advances.
• The Pentagon is probing whether to still use Chinook helicopters in combat zones, such as the one that Taliban insurgents attacked that killed 30 US troops last week.
• Asian and European stocks suffered another dismal day as the financial community increasingly eyes today's Federal Reserve meeting.
• Scientists have discovered that the earth's magnetic belt contains antiprotons, formed by cosmic rays colliding with earth's upper atmosphere.