Friday, March 9, 2012

Last Call

Congratulations, America's climate scientists!  You can all quit your jobs and take up gardening and Words With Friends because we don't need you any more.  It turns out Oklahoma Republican Sen. James Inhofe has proven once and for all that climate change can't possibly hurt us.  His painstaking research has been published in America's most trusted scientific journal, The Holy Bible.

Senator James Inhofe (R-OK) appeared on Voice of Christian Youth America’s radio program Crosstalk with Vic Eliason yesterday to promote his new book The Greatest Hoax: How the Global Warming Conspiracy Threatens Your Future, where he repeated his frequent claim that human influenced climate change is impossible because “God’s still up there.” Inhofe cited Genesis 8:22 to claim that it is “outrageous” and arrogant for people to believe human beings are “able to change what He is doing in the climate.”

Well, glad that pesky controversy is over with.  SUV's for all the people!  God's got Her finger on the thermostat and the controls, so we can just launch blocks of carbon into volcanoes and everything will be just fine.

"My favorite is Genesis 8:22 which is ‘as long as the earth remains there will be seed time and harvest, cold and heat, winter and summer, day and night,’ you know, God’s still up there. There’s another piece of Scripture I’ll mention which I should’ve mentioned, no one seems to remember this, the smartest thing the activists did in trying to put their program through is try to get the evangelicals on their side, so they hired a guy named Cizik, and he had his picture in front of Vanity magazine dressed like Jesus walking on water. He has been exposed since then to be the liberal that he is. I would say that the other Scripture that I use quite frequently on this subject is Romans 1:25, ‘They give up the truth about God for a lie and they worship God’s creation instead of God, who will be praised forever.’ In other words, they are trying to say we should worship the creation. We were reminded back in Romans that this was going to happen and sure enough it’s happening."

Oh well then.  Praise Jeebus and pass the emissions.  Aren't you glad this guy is making laws for all Americans?

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