Last Call

In probably the greatest black culture smash hit since Homeboys in Outer Space, former Ohio GOP Secretary of State Ken "Voting Machine Integrity" Blackwell and former Clown Car Cavalcade contestant Herman "Dressed to the Nines" Cain want you to know how Republicans are working to protect the African-American vote. You know, by protecting voting precincts from African-American voters actually voting in them. Or something. Jim Newell at Wonkette is nicer than I am:

Herman Cain and Ken Blackwell, the former Ohio secretary of state who STOLE THE 2004 ELECTION WITH MACHINES, have teamed up to produce this video about the Right to Vote. They do so by criticizing the Justice Department’s attempts to ensure black people can vote in the face of new laws that are clearly trying to suppress black turnout. And how could DoJ also refuse to pursue the New Black Panther Party scandal? Herman Cain and Ken Blackwell would have pursued it, for civil rights.

Me, I couldn't resist the whole Mantan/Hollywood Shuffle angle, but then again that's probably why I'm a blogger as a hobby and not getting paid for it professionally.

Seriously, folks. Ken Blackwell talking about protecting the black vote is pretty much the equivalent of Gargamel explaining how all the Smurfs will be much safer and will be free from the sorrows of fungus-based housing if he just cages them, removes their skins, and uses them to make gold out of lead. Blackwell invented digital vote swiping and as both Secretary of State in charge of the election process WHILE STILL DUBYA'S STATE CAMPAIGN CHAIR, he sure did a great job of disenfranchising a whole hell of a lot of African-Americans in 2004 to give the state and the country to Bush. Look where THAT got us, right? Here's the video if you want a chuckle.



Me, I'm going to be over here, so completely outraged that an entire Super Star Destroyer hasn't crashed into Ken Blackwell's muppet head yet that I'm liable to start building one just for this purpose. Assholes.